But the imaam doesn’t like me! (or does he?)

Q: Assalamualaikum: Can we pray behind an Imam who you feel does not like you or makes you uncomfortable? The reason why I ask is I went to a mosque near my work for Dhuhr prayer and the Imam of the mosque gives me a uncomfortable feeling when I see him. This is not the only time I felt this way, last ramadan I felt the same way when I would make eye contact with him after Jummah. My father has told me I shouldn’t pray behind someone if he makes you feel uncomfortable or if he doesn’t like you. So stopped going to that mosque. Recently, I have been trying to pray my five daily salahs so decided that I will go there Monday-Thursday. So I when I saw him today for Dhuhr I got that same feeling again. I know he has had some issues with my family in the past, but I feel like he is keeping a grudge against me due to that. All I want is to pray my salah and the mosque is the most convenient and best place to do that of course. Any advice will help. May Allah bless you and your family. Thank you. Also, please keep my name private.

Time: Thursday February 23, 2012 at 4:35 pm

A: Wa’Alaykum Salaam,

Leave your personal feelings aside. Generally, they are from the naafs and shaytan. As a male, your duty is to perform salah with jamaat (group.) Do that at the musjid that is closest to you and move on with your tasks of the day once this is accomplished. There was no need for you to make eye contact with anyone. Eye contact is not the purpose of you going to the musjid. Eye contact, handshakes etc. are generally by-the-way actions. Sadly, they appear to be becoming the central action of your worship. Go pray and then leave. The more you allow eye contact and handshake matters to come in the way, the more shaytan will inspire you with negativity (handshake was weak, handshake was not as smooth, handshake was not coupled with eye contact, etc!). These are all distractions from shaytan. You must learn the virtue of salah with jamat, perform it and move on with duties that would make you a better person.

Allah Certainly Knows Best. (dictated and published by admin as per imaam)

experimenting is fine *between spouses*, breaking your cherished values is not

Q: I just wanted to ask when a man and women are married in islam is it allowed for a husband to experiment with sex on his wife? For example they

bathing matter

Q: Asalam alikum, i am embarrassed to ask this question. i am newly married and my friends to can benefit from it to. If a little bit o seminal discharge after

‘leading Tahajjud Prayers with my wife’

Q: If I am leading Tahajjud Prayers and my wife is standing behind me. Do I recite Quran Loudly or Do I recite Quran silentlyl?

L.O.V.E stands for (L=Loss, O=of, V=Valuable, E= Energy

Q: Salam,

I have read many of the questions and your answers to them… I find it really soothing…..but i am in stress. My Alevels exams are coming up ( in January) and then again i m in a relationship with a girl… After reading some of your relationship related answers i try to keep it very holy… I used to touch her before (just hold hands) but after reading frm this site i stopped…. Problem is her parents found out about our relationship and they are trying to seperate us from each other…..she doesnot want it neither do i…relationship mixed with the exams i m really stressd….. Your advices are very comforting ….pls advice me on this matter…. Is there any dua to comfort me at this time? Pls give me something…( i just hope my message is not informal . I mean no disrespect) thank you

Time: Sunday September 18, 2011 at 9:36 pm

A:    (by Br: Yassir Butt. Due to time constraints,from time to time we send questions to him for answering; we appreciate all that he does for the community.)

We were taught by our elders L.O.V.E stands for (L=Loss, O=of, V=Valuable, E= Energy) and it seems that is what your are doing to yourself.  You should be focusing on your A levels my naive friend.  Your relationship is invalid and is in direct violation of our islaimc ethical code (touching or no touching, good try though).  First ace your A levels to show you can do something than hopefully request your father to propose to her family and ask her hand in marriage (try to be a man for a change).  Do not fan the flames of desire unless you can extinguish them with the water of a halal relationship like marriage otherwise these flames have a tendency to burn down anything in their path.

helping out parents

Q: Assalam u Aleykum Imam: I have a question in regards to serving Parents? My parents live with me and I have 3 kids all very young; the only way I support my parents is providing them lodging and taking care of their well being, I do not

and after 23 years, this is my thanks!

Q: asalmualaikum,

Imam saab i have a very very bad situation in my family at the moment. i just dont know what to do please answer this question on your site so because i need dire advice.  my daughter of deviant of Islam she has morals no values all she does is abuse me and my wife. she runs all over us she doesnt listen she does

it is not the end of the world my sister

Q: Asalam Alikum, I belong to a very nice muslim family MashAllah. however, a year ago i got involved in a serious relationship with a guy whom i loved so dearly and we were very much committed towards eachother. we were in a long

life is to precious for you to be in continual conflict

Q: As Salam Alaikum Imam Sahab,

May Allah Bless you for how you find time to read our questions and provide replies. May he reward you in both worlds.
My question is about duties of husband. I live in Texas, US got remarried 3.5yrs ago and have two children from my previous marraige. I was a working woman,

your matter runs deeper

Q:  Hello I am a young unmarried muslim female,
There is a catholic male i am interested in, who (before meeting me) is interested in Islam and is in the process of converting. I have already read through your responses to the many similar questions people have asked, but some do not seem clear to me. My parents like any other muslim parent wishes to choose a groom for me, but i have seen and conversed with the person they have picked and i do not like who they are. They are not corrupt, but they just do not have the same values as i do. Soon i have to meet his family and make the final decision, but i know if i disagree to the marriage they may pressure me or threaten me. My parents have gotten physically abusive before.
My first question is, if they force the marriage on me and they do a nikka will that nikka be valid?

And suggesting the catholic soon to be muslim convert male to my parents is out of the question. They WILL say no and once again my life may be threatened. in this case, is marriage without the consent of my parents invalid?

if it is valid, but there are some consequences can you please clearly state them to me. Will allah consider us married? – that is my main concern.

My next question is, if the marriage is valid, is proxy marriage in this situation allowed and what would the requirements be.

if we had two male witnesses would they need to be with him or could one be with me. I know me being a female may not allow that.
I have also heard a muslim female may not get married without a wali. but in this case, i do not have a wali. At all.

My main concern is for our nikka to be valid in Allah’s view.
I respect my parents greatly, but in some ways under islam they are corrupt. I hope that if it is valid to get married to this convert man, that one day may my parents forgive me.

Thank you, i will respect your response even if it not what i want to hear.

I would just like to for once live among peaceful non corrupt muslims, and this decision will determine that.
Time: Friday April 1, 2011 at 6:13 pm

Answer: Overall, your concern remains very similar to the many others. It has been answered. i am glad to rephrase my response.
*Parents can recommend a groom for a person of marriageable age and ability.
*Although you present yourself as  a possible victim, let me ask you, how did you just meet up with this ‘catholic’ fellow and chose to be interested in him. I appreciate him wanting to convert,  it sounds like you are pursuing him yet attempting to secure yourself should something go wrong in the relationship. It sure seems as if you like challengers. This behavior to me appears unhealthy.

*Your life should not be threatened due to you not wanting to marry a given person. Should this be the case, Islam does not advocate violence to resolve matters as its primary preferred choice.
*Marriage without parental consent is abhorring. You are mature enough to say no. If you accept a Muslim male in the presence of Muslim witnesses, then naturally you would be viewed as married. This is a general rule that applies to all cultures/societies. Additionally, you are old enough and seemingly coherent enough to express yourself. If your parents chose not to listen, merely go with your parents and visit with a panel of scholars that can better explain the matter to them.

*Them more important question you should ask of yourself is as follows: what are the consequences if my (our) parents are not pleased with me (us), since Allah demands them to be pleased with me (us).
* From a religious point of view, parents cannot discriminate due to him being a convert.
I think your matter goes deeper. I think it is beyond catholic and muslim, parents verses daughter, etc. I am not comfortable with what i am seeing above as part of your query. I suggest you go for some real in person assistance.
Allah Certainly Knows Best.