new muslim woman matters

Q: Salam Aleikum,

I am a college-aged female, raised in Utah and California.  I left the religion I was born into a few years ago, because I felt that it was a construed truth.
Then, about a year ago, I was introduced to Islam, praise be to God.  I have been studying it ever since.  The Truth speaks to my heart and I want to be a Muslim very badly, but I live in Southern Utah, and I don’t know anyone who I feel I can consult on things.
I am overwhelmed by the information on the internet, a lot of it is very overwhelming, especially because I am trying to learn to recite in arabic and I have no persons to help me.
I just want to pray in a manner that is acceptable before God.
What are the Necessary things that should be recited during prayers?
If I mispronounce, is it okay?
Do I need to cover my hair in public?
If I am alone do I need to cover everything but my hands and face to pray?

I am scared that such an abrupt outward change would not go over well with my family and friends.
I really want to make this change, and praise God I have already found so much joy and peace in my life thanks to the things I have learned.
But It is such a big change, I feel like I am a child again.  I am scared that I will never be able to be a ‘good muslim’ or that I will loose my identity, because I am giving up so much of what used to be my identity.
I know these are weaknesses in me, but I would appreciate it if you could lend your wisdom and knowledge of the Holy Qu’ran to one who feels like a newborn child.
Thank you
Time: Monday July 4, 2011 at 3:08 am

Answer: From Br Yassir Butt. (I do thank him for taking out the time from his busy schedule to answer the following:)

Quran Chapter 28: verses 52-54

(As to) those whom we gave the Book before it (Jews or Christians), they are believers in it.

 And when it (The Holy Quran) is recited to them they say: We believe in it surely it is the truth from our Lord; surely we were submitters before this.

 These shall be granted their reward twice, because they are steadfast and they repel evil with good and spend out of what we have given them.

The last verse has an embedded promise for those who seek the truth (from the Jews and the Christians) that if they were to believe in the what has been revealed (Islam) they will be given twice the reward compared to someone who was not aware of the scriptures before the Quran.

You indicated that you had changed your religion once before from what you were born into, and your family was accepting of it or at least they did not try to mitigate your conversion (I assume).

So may be this time your apprehensions and fears (about sudden outward changes) may not be well placed based on historical precedent? What do you think, you decide?

As far as your inquiry about covering and praying are concerned although well placed and point to your passion and concern regarding the search for the truth.  In Islam till you have (without pressure or coercion) accepted this religion and pronounced your faith publicly you are not bound by its rules and regulations as such you are worrying about things before the appropriate time!

It is like somebody who is worried about getting a traffic citation and they even do not own a car yet, leave aside driving it?

If such a thing does occur in your future (we pray that God picks for you what is good for you) at your own accord than it would be wise for you to find the closest Islamic center (Which may be at a distance) and get instructions on how to pray and other rituals which you will find surprisingly simple and do-able till you learn everything like the correct pronunciation etc.

Till than one can call upon the almighty and seek his assistance in any manner till things are resolved in your mind.

Remember during this process to respect your family at every juncture and yet have the courage to accept the truth politely and not dishonor your mother, father and siblings or look down on what they do as this is something that no one but God has control over.

We are taught that it is not by one’s own action that he becomes a truth acceptor but by the grace and acceptance of the all mighty only one is allowed into his kingdom.

والله أعلم

5 responses to “new muslim woman matters

  1. I live in Northern Utah and I understand what you are going through. I took Shahadah only in June. I am so happy . Only Allah could have led me here, as I had studied Islam before and then went on with my life the way it was. This time, I could not rest until I was able to contact the Imaam from our Masjid and recite the Shahadah. I hope you find a community in your area. I know there are a lot up North here. Maybe that will be a possibility: for you to come up here for the day. May Allah bless you in your search.

  2. Your Sister in Islam

    Assalama Aalykoum sister,
    In addition to the advice given, One of the characteristic of Allah(s.w.t) is that he is Rab. Rab roughly translated means that he is the one who gradual moulds you into a better person. So gradual is the KEY! Therefore, take everything slowly, baby steps at a time and inshallah you would accomplish so many things. Make sure your interior and exterior grow in Islam at the same rate. Otherwise, if you exterior is looking more Islamic than your interior than there would be a problem that’s when you will feel suffocate. What I am saying is make sure you bring your heart into all your learning and gradually make it comfortable with every new Islamic thing you learn. If you do that then automatically it will be translated in your outer appearance. Make lots of dua (prayer) in every new step you take and pray to Allah (s.w.t) that he makes your heart firm in that new action. Remember, Dua is different than the actually prayer and it can be done in your own language.
    Remember, no matter how overwhelming or big things seem, Allah (s.w.t) greatness and mercy is much greater so prayer to him and ask his assistance. Break up every task for example (prayer) in to little tasks and give yourself reasonable deadlines to accomplish their memorization in Arabic and at the same time comprehension of what you are saying in Arabic.
    Remember that Allah (s.w.t) loves you because whomever he loves he guides them. He has guided you to the true religion through his mercy so never lose hope in Allah (s.w.t) mercy.
    Regarding your family, I would say take it slow with them. You do not need to declare you are Muslim to them right way. Let them notice the amazing changes Islam brings within you in the way you behave towards them. That way when you are very comfortable with your identity as a Muslim you can have a talk with them. Also remember do not try to get in argument about religions because it will just weaken your faith and make you frustrated. Pray for your family and Remember Allah (s.w.t) is the only one who guides hearts.
    Spend time reading through the translation of the Quran and listen to the Arabic as well. Try going to the following website:–> choose any recite you like and the simplest translation I have found was the “Eng-Mufti Taqi Usmani”
    For salah: check out this website. It has Arabic saying in audio so you can hear.
    (sadly we had to omit site for certain security reasons)
    Also go through the audio in this website ( and listen to the lectures the imam has recorded they are very inspirational Mashallah. May Allah (s.w.t) reward him and bless him and his family. Ameen
    All the best, May Allah (s.w.t) make it easy on you and on all of us inshallah. Ameen.

  3. Praise be to Allah Who has guided you to Islam. This is a great blessing that cannot be matched by any other blessing on earth. Undoubtedly the committed Muslim who is new in Islam will face some difficulties and problems, especially when they come from a way of life which has to be changed when one enters Islam. As a result, the new Muslim may face some difficulties with his/her family and the society in which s/he lives. the problems you have mentioned above, they are very understandable sister, I pray to Allah(swt) to ease every matter you are currently facing InshaAllah. In addition to the advice given, you should look for committed and righteous friends who can help you, teach you and give you advice so that you will not be affected by the atmosphere around you; so that the Shaytaan(devil) or bad friends cannot make you slip or go back to your former ways. as far as wearing the hijaab in public, yes it is a command from Allah (swt) and also know that, wearing a hijaab in Islam is an act to convey dignity, chastity, self-respect, respect for others, and promotes individuality and characteristics ideal to the equality of women; however, don’t expect these changes to happen overnight(pronouncing Arabic words/praying properly, wearing hijaab in public..etc), but allow them to happen as you work through the different issues you are facing. you should read the Imam’s website daily, and if you have questions always ask for clarifications. I am not so sure about Masjid khadeeja having a program for new Muslims, but Masjid Al-Noor does. there is a sister who is so committed in teaching the new Muslims how to pray, learning/reciting small suras for prayers etc.. and they meet every Friday after the evening prayer(Maghrib). understandably, you are facing difficulties but Allah(swt) will help you and will protect you if He knows that you are sincere and you have pure intention. I ask Allah (swt) to make you steadfast in Islam.

  4. Salaam alaykum sister! I have been where you are, and it is sooo overwhelming, and soooo solitary of an experience. Just take your time, as much as you need to learn, understand and practice your religion. Allah (swt) knows your intentions, and your heart and will guide you. You should try and contact the sisters that meet on Fridays…the number and email is on the website for Khadeeja Masjid in the sister’s corner. There is always a chance that SOMEONE in our community knows another Muslim down south! I wish the best for you, and peace and happiness in all your journeys forward.