why i do i just cry

Q: Salam Alaykum Sheikh Mehtar,

I am a recently married female. I am overly sensitive and seem to cry, get offended, or get sad at the slightest of situations or comments from my husband. I don’t know why…but I can’t help the tears and I can’t help getting offended even at things I know I shouldn’t be offended by. It’s becoming a domino effect and I’m not sure how to even tackle this situation…
Please give advice if you can,
Time: Monday July 4, 2011 at 7:12 pm
A: وعليكم السلام ورحمة الله وبركاته
Here is how you can start to tackle your issue. As you are aware, different people react differently to different situations. Being newly married has pressures in itself. The added stress of marriage causes one to better learn about themselves as well as about another person, coupled with learning about the finer details of another family — in-laws. Not knowing how to react to this ‘new’ situation causes an imbalance that could result in frustration which can often lead to tears.
Other times, a person may have unresolved emotions that forces out tears. Such tears  could be indicative of not being able to express a part of the self. You have to ask your self, what is the cause of my tears. This answer may come after a while, once you are able to pinpoint the cause, your tears would be shared in a more appropriate manner.
Allah Certainly Knows Best.


2 responses to “why i do i just cry

  1. you should in addition be patient. As marriage is patience.Read the Holy Quran always and insha Allah u will be out of anger with your husband.

  2. As-salaam-alaikum and congratulations newlywed. Your hormones may be a little off and therefore make you more sensitive. If you are taking birth control pills or you may even be pregnant. I do suggest if this continues, in addition to the Imam’s advice and prayer suggestions, get a blood test to check your hormone levels and balance. It may be just a simple little thing of PMS that has occurred after marriage. Insha-Allah you will be fine and your husband will be patient.
    Jazakullah Khair