student matters do matter, even if made to feel ‘stupid’

Q:
Assalama Alaykum Imam,
How do you deal with teachers that underestimate you because of  your gender and religion. As a student, you go to your teachers to get help for material you dont understand in lecture, but it does not help when the teacher gives you that look…the look of underestimation. Instead of helping you they just make you feel stupid  and at the end you just feel really low and start questioning your intelligence. You really hate going to them to ask help because they create an evironment that intimatate you and you dont even comprehend what they are saying because of the environment they create.
How can I go to my teachers and get the information i need without letting the factors of underestimation, intimidation come in the way?
Jazkallahu Kahir for your time and your advice!

Time: Tuesday October 5, 2010 at 7:18 pm

Answers: وعليكم السلام ورحمة الله وبركاته
In Islam there is no such a thing as gender bias as it relates to a student and teacher relationship and gaining maximum benefit to all that which is permissible in a permissible manner.
1) There two types of teachers
a)one that cares for your success and cares for you as a human
b)the other is the one that cares for their success at the expense of the student

2) Likewise, there are two types of students:
a)one that cares for their success and would continue to inquire and pursue its outcome until they acquire that which is needed from a given class/subject
b)the other type of student is one that expects to be spoon fed, or did not do the prerequisites for a given class, or lacks the maturity to be part of a given program, lacks discipline yet insists on a productive outcome

In either of the above, you must be true to your self. You must also be aware of teacher likes/dislikes, teacher demands/requirements, student strength/weakness. Your potential too must always be evaluated for greater student success.

Student primary tasks: (read this as well to eliminate your possible problem)
A student must stay focused as to their primary objectives. If you are there for knowledge, you must seek to get it. You must not feel intimidated. Sometimes intimidation is used to test your perseverance. Other times, intimidation is used because the teacher may not know better. By Contrast, if the teacher cannot express the subject matter to you, then in such a case, a student must go to someone else that w/could assist them. To think low of a  teacher only hurts you. Sometimes a change creates better comprehension. As a student, you must examine and evaluate that which would benefit you most on every level.

If anyone makes you feel ‘stupid,’ consider this a gift to make you do better. Do not let little things pull you down. Being pulled down by mere hostilities or petty actions is an indication of a weakness within you. You must persevere. To persevere you must have a hidden drive and this drive comes out of continual advanced learning of the given material,  being ready for every class prior to the given class and being in constant review mode of past material.

Allah Certainly Knows Best.

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