‘secret wedding’

Q: Assalamu alaikum,
a muslim sister has got married to a man, wose parents don´t know about the marriage. She is a convert and decided to marry this man. Is this marriage lawful? Important to know is that her husbands parents don´t know anything about this marriage.
Are there any hadith, which show that maybe it is necessary for the boys´ parents to know about that marriage.
She lives in Europe and he, too. His parents live in an islamic country. So he is far away from them.
thanks in advance
Time: Wednesday September 29, 2010 at 6:15 pm

A: وعليكم السلام ورحمة الله وبركاته

  • If both are muslim and performed the nikah with valid amount of witnesses, the marriage would go through.
  • Marriage without a wali (guardian) is reprehensible, more so if one excluded them without a valid reason. In either case the nikah does go through.
  • Not letting the parents know of the nikah would be to possibly beg for a reduction in parental blessings (barakah.) Being far away is not an excuse. Emails, postcards, text messages, etc. can all function as a form of sharing marital data and  gaining parental blessings. Quran demands respect towards respect, part of respect demands sharing all that would benefit them and make them happy. Thus, if he has desires that need to be fulfilled, at the same time he is aware that parental health would worsen as a result of such information sharing, then he can abstain from sharing such data to his parents.
  • Under general circumstances, one should announce their nikahs so as to avoid unwanted accusation, etc. Islam frowns upon secret nikahs.

Allah Certainly Knows Best.

p.s. As an added gesture, we recommended individuals follow the laws of their land as well.

Allah Certainly Knows Best.


One response to “‘secret wedding’

  1. Assalamu alaikum, i would like to know if a nikkah if acceptable without the muslim girl’s guardian knowing?