you answer us, we answer you

Q:

As Salamu Aleikum,

This is Urgent!!!!!

I am a certified Unicorn Trainer, is it Halal to keep a Unicorn in my house, and if I get hungry, is it Halal to eat him?

Let me know!

Time: Tuesday April 20, 2010 at 1:30 pm
A: وعليكم السلام ورحمة الله وبركاته

Kindly share with us: The definition of a unicorn? What does a Unicorn trainer such as yourself do? What is the unicorn’s food comprised of? Is being a unicorn trainer an ‘occupation’ in the true sense of the word and thus forms a system of livelihood for yourself? Or is it a mere hobby?   Does being a unicorn trainer promote irreligious sentiments? Is it linked to any type of mythology? etc. etc.

We appreciate the urgency. Sadly, all responses are taking an approximate minimum wait time of 10 to 15 days. If any of you do not see a response within the 10 to 15 day range, trust us, eventually you will, inshaAllah. We appreciate each individuals question that is sent to our site. Never feel shy due to the delay. We are honored to serve each of you.

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5 responses to “you answer us, we answer you

  1. Ex Certified Unicorn trainer (My certification was just revoked)

    A unicorn is a one horned mythical creature. As a unicorn trainer, I used to imagine the unicorn, take care of him, feed him imaginary hay, and give him imaginary baths. I cannot say its my livlihood, because I started yesterday and I am no longer a unicorn trainer anymore. I for one feel that training unicorns did breed unreligious sentiment. Allah is Al Haq, so literally being The Reality, he does not like for us to live in an imaginary world. He likes for us to understand the true meaning of life and appreciate what we have, not spend all day day dreaming about taking care of fairy tale creatures. It is linked to a type of mythology.

    I am sorry for saying that this was urgent, when really it wasn’t. I thought the Imam might get a kick out of it, I just wanted to make people smile. I appologize to all the people who I jumped in line with my silly question.

    • Assalaamu’Alaikum,
      We’re giving you back your certification; you did make us smile, and we, not the imam, answered the question with further questions so that others would also have an opportunity to smile, so no harm done.

      And also because we didn’t want the unicorn to haunt us if you made zabiha with him.

      Wassalaam.

  2. Certified Unicorn Trainer

    Oh great, I’m having a Bar-B-Que, when I do I’ll let you know

  3. Ha ha ha..........

    That was really funny and creative, I got a kick out of it. I have a concern here though, I hope you are not making fun of the questions people really ask on this website! Alhamdulilah we have a wonderful Imaam and a source we can easily refer to and learn from. Although funny, in a way its weird……………………….:) I dont think you should do such things……………

  4. Certified Unicorn Trainer

    It is a guilty pleasure I guess ;)