beating, firearm, divorced, etc

Q. My husband beats me up. Does drugs. Never works. never supports the family. We have children. He issued me 3 talaqs. One in January. One is march. On on eid morning because my dress were as good as other woman. I bought the best I could afford with my money. A local imaam has said that the talaqs are not not real because he was angry.Also islam wants the best for the kids so its not a reall divorce my husband gave me. He has shot at me with a gun several times. Each time missing me but scared ( xxxxxxx)  me and the kids…. Imaam I really am ( vvvvvvvv)  up. I am depressed. I never know whats going to happen when I enter the home.  I really need your help. I called the Islamic center and got no help. Can you help me. I am xxxxxxxxxxx (background with help)

Time: Saturday November 28, 2009 at 4:11 am

A: You need to involve the authorities. The aspect of the firearm is VERY serious. You also need to contact a qualified local leader to best assist you with making the right decision. You need to go back to your parents residence, if it is safe and possible for you to do so. You cannot live with a violent person in the manner you have described.

He needs to be placed in rehab as well.

As we see, your nikah is nonexistent. Unless, you can prove that he mentioned the talaqs to you in the state of insanity. Had the original fatwa been passed based on insanity, then the matter would be different. Divorced or not, you need time out for your safety and the safety of your children. You cannot live with a man (stranger) when you are divorced. According to us, you are divorced.

Please go for immediate help. Your life, and the life of your family is to precious.

May Allah (SWT) help you, Ameen.

Allah Certainly Knows Best.

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2 responses to “beating, firearm, divorced, etc

  1. Asalaamualaykum,

    Man what is wrong with these types of men!

    I think some precautionary measurements should be taken before weddings like this occur.

    For example, when a woman is looking at an eligible bachelor, what sorts of characteristics should she be looking for in him that would predict this sort of sickening behavior?

    And also what can sisters do to prevent themselves from marrying animals like this? Obviously practicing the faith is key, but what specifically in that realm would help?

    May Allah (SWT) help this poor sister and put sense into the beasts that bring this type of mess on a family.

  2. i could not agree more with you…You have said it well… i have only shared this one email with you all… let me say no more … sadly, this is just the tip of the iceberg.

    Characteristics that should be sort. How about one for now:

    Person with strong religious values that comes from a family that has strong religious values. Yes, how her brothers and sisters, cousins, uncles and aunts behave indicate a little/lot about her/him! (Examine hadith)
    (Note: I did not say seek a person with strong cultural roots! We not talking of clothing and food types with skin color with a tongue type match. I am saying seek religiousity as part of your decision making process.) If the culture and religion are one, then let me say this: you have a gem in hand. You are blessed indeed.